


The Mission

by codewc (orphan_account)



Series: Heart On Your Sweater [1]
Category: Gorillaz
Genre: (murdoc is trans!), 2D is crushing real hard, Alternate Universe, F/M, Romance, Trans Female Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-03
Updated: 2016-10-18
Packaged: 2018-08-19 07:58:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 7,785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8196857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/codewc
Summary: Stuart punches his mate for insulting pole dancer, Murdoc Niccals. Bumbling romance ensues. (In which Stuart Tusspot has a flaming crush on trans fem Murdoc Niccals, because I can do what I want.)





	1. My name is Stu-Pot, but you can call me.....

**Author's Note:**

> This started out as a basic copy of this scene : (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TcjmybotZ74) from one of my favorite movies, Soldier Girl, but hopefully if I continue it'll spiral into something else. I figured this would be interesting for 2doc and I'm quite frankly in need for some trans fem Murdoc, ya feel me?

"Welcome to my humble little dressing room."

Her voice is deep and crooked. The way she stepped passed him and looked over her shoulder is graceful. Her hair falls in her face and she tucks it behind her ear with confidence. And it's all so entrancing to Stuart that he just looks dumbly back into her mismatched, watching eyes.

"Uh," her eyebrow quirks, "take off your shirt, then."

Stuart jumps a bit at that, quickly stepping aside as she reaches for the knob behind him to shut the door. He turns and suddenly the air refreshingly lilac smell of the room hits him and his knees go all wobbly and why was he here again? 

" 'S-Scuse me?"he says, watching her walk across the room to take off her red coat and oh, there she is, in her bra. 

"You smell like day old rum, bluebird,"she explains, back to him. "Then again, some barflies might find you charming."

Stuart touches his shirt in confusion, feels the damp stain and is reminded of, oh yeah, right. His mate just did throw a beer at him after Stuart tried to whack him for calling the dancer, in front of him, a tranny. That's why he's here.

Once he's put two and two together he looks back up and finds that she already has a sponge in her hand, so he feels compelled to join her. He looks sheepishly at the countertop so as to not accidentally be caught staring at the dancer's rack again. Before, it was his mate who pointed it out, which ultimately resulted in this.

_"Go on then,"he slurred,"find out if they're real."_

He tries his best to seem interested in the names of the beauty products displayed before him, but he can feel her eyes on him. He loses his grip, clearly, as he looks back at her and catches a glimpse of her chest yet again. He wonders how practical that bra is, anyhow. It barely covers anything.

She has his shirt in her hand as she scrubs at it, but keeps her eyes on him. They're quizzical. They're amused.

"So wha' do you think of Blur?"she asks, topically. He looks away then, but quickly back and he realizes how nervous he must come off as. "Different."

Stuart notes how well her hair frames her face as she dips her head a bit, a smirk coating her lips. "Not your thing, huh?"

She stops scrubbing then, just gripping his shirt and Stuart knows she can hear him gulp. "Or maybe you don't know if it's your thing? Is tha' it?"

Stuart doesn't know what to say. He's honest to God trapped by her, entranced by her and frankly, scared of her. He can really feel how stupid he sounds when he spats;

"I thought you were the best one on stage."

She lets go of him then, chuckles to herself. " 'Course I was,"she sneers, goes back to scrubbing. "But, thank you."

He scratches the back of his ear, can already feel the silence seeping in and really can't help but feel that mucking about with someone as -as _fascinating_ as this woman really is a waste of time. He wants to say something, really he does. He looks to the floor and looks to the wall for some answer. He can hear the club music bursting through the ceiling and wonders if he's getting another headache.

"They are real," she mutters. Stuart just replies with a 'hmph' and looks at her resting face. "Your friend," she says,"asked if they were real."

Oh.

"He's a real knob, sorry," Stuart says almost instantly and she gives him another smile. Her teeth ain't perfect and Stuart, for whatever reason, likes it. 

"I see," she pats his upper arm before turning and walking to yet another table covered in cosmetics, "you're a right ol' gentleman, aren't you, bluebird?"

Stuart suddenly feels sturdier, his back goes rigid as he says, "well I was, uh, brought up a certain way to act around a lady."

She scoffs, looks over her shoulder. "A lady?"

"That's right."

She has a nice, cynical smile, this time, gestures for Stuart to join her and as he steps closer he notices the hairdryer. 

"Those eyes of yours," she comments over the harsh blow of the dryer. He blinks dumbly before going, "oh yeah."

"Um uh,"his brow furrows, "truck, twice, 8 ball fracture."

Her lips quirk. "And tha' means what to me?"

He doesn't say anything, doesn't feel like it. His chest tightens. "Goodness me," she shakes her head, "you're an odd one, that's for sure."

Stuart glances at her chest, again, travels down her body. Tight, short pants and those boots. Mustn't be comfortable in the least. 

"I bet guys hit on you all the time," he blurts, wants to cover his mouth but knows it'll only make him more foolish. She gives him a playful look, though, and shrugs a shoulder. "I get attention."

She puts the dryer down before giving Stuart a look over, leaning against the table. Stuart is feeling a mixture of flattered, mildly seduced and fear. It's quite new. 

"Do you ever get shy?" she says, clearly calling Stuart out for his not so obvious agenda. He feels a layer of guilt and scratches his arm.

"Around pretty, half-naked women -"-don't get cocky," she hisses and it takes him aback, slightly.

"Do _you_ ever get shy?" he asks softly. She rests a hand on her hip. "Why would I?"

She then turns away from him, which he feels is partly contradictory and she sits down to start on something he recognizes as a blush. 

"What is your mission, anyway?"

"Well uh," he then sits down next to her to meet her level, "I'm meant to find out if-"

He stops himself. For once, Stuart Tusspot, don't act stupid.

"I'm meant to find out how ya' dance so good."

She laughs anyway. Stuart likes that scratchy, twisted laugh, though, so it isn't all that bad. 

The laugh is interrupted by the click of the door opening and a group of dancers piling in after the other. "Oh, look what we have here," one, in a disc dress, coos and rests a hand on Stuart's shoulder. 

"We're starting another set soon," she informs Stuart. He feels panic erupt in his chest and gathers himself to lean into her and whisper against her cheek, "can I have your number?"

"I don't even know your name."

"It's Stuart Pot. You can call me Stu-Pot, though."

He watches her look at him questioningly and then stares at her reflection in the mirror.

She's got a twisted nose, thick eyebrows, and tired eyes. Her teeth are sharp and crooked. Her lips are painted and pursed. Her skin is a golden brown. It has a strong contrast against her black bangs. She's not necessarily pretty, but she sure is good to look at. At least to Stuart, she is. 

He doesn't even notice that she's scribbled her number down on a piece of paper and shoved it against his chest. "You don't have any obligation to use this," she mutters in his ear. He can smell her alcoholic breath. It's piercing. "Mr. Pot," she muses.

"You can stay if you want,"the disc dress jokes, but Stuart looks up at her with a nervous smile. "Uh, no thanks."

He gets up then, gives her one last look and leaves with haste. 

When the dancers are alone, the disc dress dancer looms over the said dancer sitting and still working on her blush. "You got a lover boy, hey Murdoc? He's cute."

Murdoc throws her brush at the other.

* * *

 

 

When Stuart stumbles into the apartment and clumsily takes off his shoes, he jumps at the sound of Russel's voice.

"Ey, Stu, what'cha doin'?" Russel yawns, scratches the back of his head. Stuart doesn't reply but instead holds up the slip in his hand and Russel's eyes widen, then he smiles.

"Nice. What's her name?"

Stuart blinks. A palm slams against his forehead. "Ah, _shit._ "

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the pronoun game is stupid, but to clear up any confusion: 2D asked for Murdoc's number and Murdoc gave it to him in her cliche tsundere manner, baka.


	2. ...ANYTIME

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The obligatory exposition chapter. Hooray. I pretty much wrote this exactly after the first chapter. Takes place a little while after the first chapter, told mostly from Murdoc's POV (because fuck do I need that) and ey, Russel.

Luckily, Murdoc is in the Winnebago when the phone rings. 

She rolls onto her back, picks up the phone and her toes curl. " 'Ello, 'ello, 'ello."

Murdoc rests her face in her palm when she hears a familiar, squawky voice. "Um, uh, do you remember me?" Murdoc tries not to snap at him, really she does. He's a cutie, dammit. "Myyyes,"she drawls, twirls a strand of hair around her finger. "Mr. Pot, I remember you. Do you remember me?"

She finds the pause hilarious. Is he actually considering the question? Holy shit. 

"Well, yeah,"his breath is against the receiver,"um, I can't say it aloud right now uh." She can hear shuffling in the background. There's static.

Murdoc rolls onto her side, reaches for her pack of cigarettes on her nightstand. "Oh, I understand."

Then she hears a deep, soothing voice and can't help but press the phone closer to her ear. 

"Who're you talking to, Stu?"the deep voice asks.

"Uh," static, "my mum."

 

Murdoc drops the pack, the cigarettes scatter all over her bed. She presses her hand against her mouth, holding in her cackles. Oh, sweet Satan.

 

"You call your mom often?"the voice continues.

"Yeah, Russ," so his name's Russ, hm.

 

 The cackles die in her hand and she instead picks up a single cig, pops it in her mouth. She wedges the phone between her cheek and shoulder as she digs her pocket for a lighter.

"Oh, well okay then,"the uh, Russ, says and Murdoc can hear thudding footsteps. 

 "Hi,"Stuart says, nervous. "Hi,"Murdoc replies uncharacteristically sweetly before lighting her cigarette. She takes her phone in her other hand, sits up slightly against the headboard before taking a drag. "What can I do for you, Mr.Pot?" There's another pause, a shuffle, and static.

"Uh yeah, see, I wanted a change of scenery and um," more static, "I wanted to know if you'd like a drink, with me, that is."

She keeps her cig between her two fingers. Oh, Satan. "Well,"Murdoc dips her head to the side,"I would like tha'." Murdoc glances to the ceiling to think for a moment. Explaining this never really gets easier, does it? "But you saw me, uh, Saturday night, in a show." She watches smoke burn from the end of her cig as she hears Stuart affirm with an 'uh huh'. "With lights. And stage makeup. And you were drunk." Fuck, it's hard to avoid how embarrassing this is. She takes another drag.

"Uh, so?" Exhale.

"What you saw on stage - that _creature_ ,"Murdoc adds, finding her self-deprecating humor amusing, at times, "is not the same person you'll see having a drink at a pub on Wednesday evening. In daylight. Among humans."

Murdoc assumes Stuart didn't find her stab funny, what with his sudden serious tone. "Look, I know what you look like," his voice cracks in the next bit, "you're pretty."

She's grateful to not have to react to that just yet, finding herself softly coughing and that, uh, Russ returning once again. "You call your mom pretty?" It's priceless, really.

"Hold on,"he says to Murdoc. "I'm talking to m' girlfriend. She bumped into m' mum. I'm relayin' a message."

Murdoc shuts her eyes for a moment. A dastardly smile dares to spread across her face. She thinks, _this moron_ and stabs a perfectly good cigarette into the ashtray on her nightstand.

When Russ is gone, evident from those footsteps and she assumes Stuart's attention is on her again, she says dully, "I know this pub downtown."

 

* * *

 

 When Stuart approaches Murdoc at the bar, she notices that he's actually quite a bit taller than her. That's a bonus.

"Stuart Pot,"he announces, extends a hand out to her. She looks at it questioningly but accepts it all the same. C'mon, Murdoc, make an impression. "Murdoc Niccals,"she replies. He looks relieved which itches at Murdoc. Annoying. "You look great." Not so annoying. "Thanks,"she replies. She gestures to the seat next to her.

 

* * *

 

Stuart's has had two drinks. He's sure Murdoc has had four. 

She's loosened up now. Much louder. Much cruder. He can't exactly say that he doesn't like that she curses at other patrons or that her aggressive behavior is off-putting to him, because it's not. She's just a little more intimidating, yet a little more open. Does that make sense? He downs another drink. 

He explains to her about his eyes properly over his third drink. "See, there was this truck, and it ran me over, which busted my eye. And when the people nearby called the trucker out, he pulled back and ran me over a second time, busting my other eye. So, uh, yeah." And, shockingly, Murdoc laughs. Like, a legit, genuine laugh.

Stuart doesn't react, really, because no one has ever laughed at this story before. And he tells her this. 

"Really?"she questions after her laughter has died down. "No one? But that shit's _hilarious_."

Stuart recognizes exactly how distressing that reaction is, but there's a part of him that finds it....refreshing? She shifts a bit closer to him. 

He tells her about Russel, about the band. "One of the people nearby was Russel Hobbs, my roommate. He took care of me for a while. We're in a band now. Well, sort of."

"Oh,"Murdoc stretches that out,"Russel Hobbs. Heard of 'im when I tried making a band of mine a few years back."

Stuart looks back at her. His interest is evident, so she says, "used to be in tons of bands. Thought I was gonna rule the world. Way back, though, before, uh."

Murdoc stops, looks into her glass. It takes Stuart a moment, and oh. Oh right.  

"What do you play?"he asks. Good, good cutaway. Nice one, Stuart. "Bass,"she answers, "you?"

"Keyboard,"he answers happily, "I can sing a bit, too."

Murdoc smirks at him. "Aw, you're just perfect, aren't you? Well, if it weren't for those two dents in your head." She chuckles to herself. "You got two Ds."

Stuart perks up at that. "Two Ds?" She nods. "2D. Suits you. Little ol' 2D."

He can smell her perfume. He gets a peek of her crooked teeth again. She's looking into his eyes now and he decides that hers are way better in this light.

Stuart wants to kiss her something fierce.

 

* * *

 

 

He's an easy lay, thinks Murdoc. 

He's impossibly obvious about it. Leaning into her. Complimenting her. Offering her a ride. It's very flattering, Murdoc thinks, and it's been months since she's slept with someone. Well, even longer since she's slept with a man. 

But when his hand is on her thigh, and their noses brush, too many thoughts flood into Murdoc's mind. 

He's slow. He's blunt. He's adorable. He's a singer of a band, but Satan is his voice squeaky. Then again, she hasn't heard him sing. He's probably sung for other girls. Prettier girls. Women. Does he know how stupid he is? That's both infuriating and impossibly sweet. Fuck. Fuck shit fuck.

She slides away from him, puts her hand on his shoulder. "It's time for me to go."

 

* * *

 

 

Murdoc gets another call from Stuart a week later.

She says yes. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The obligatory 2D bit was painful to write. I really want to write more of this, but I can't make any promises. I just desperately want to get to the sexy bits, but I'll have to jump through a few hoops before we get to that, so please bear with me.


	3. I just met you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time to establish a relationship. A lot of time skipping. Yes.

 

 

Their dates don't stay on a routine for the next few months. Whenever it isn't Murdoc's shift or Stuart isn't dragged by Russel on some errand, they spend time together. The only consistent thing about their dates is that it involves drinking. A lot of drinking.

Stuart recalls one date that didn't involve drinking, and probably the one he remembers the most of. 

They're seated in a theater. Stuart remembers that half way through the film Murdoc has leaned against him and snaked her hand onto his after much fidgeting and grumbles. "Why do we care about these cocks again?"she mutters to Stuart, who only answers a bit later. "Uh,"he shifts his hand to properly weave their fingers together, "because they're the protagonists?"

Murdoc scoffs and glances up at Stuart. "Those dolts are the protagonists? I'd prefer the zombies, to be frank." A smile pulls at Stuart's face. "They're not gonna win, ya know,"he informs Murdoc.

She grimaces and rests her head on his shoulder. "Then what's the point?" 

There were plenty of dates after that. 

 

* * *

 

The first time they kiss is in Stuart's car. Of course, it's in Stuart's car.

Specifically, they're in a carpark, after a rather terrible date in which Murdoc calls their waiter an arse and Stuart ran into the door, twice. 

Stuart doesn't know what it exactly was, really, but it felt right at the time. 

The kissing goes from chaste, pause, then straight to more hot, wet kissing. Stuart didn't realize how desperately he's been wanting to kiss Murdoc until it's gotten so heavy that she's weakly shoving him off of her. "Fuck,"she breathes,"what're you, deprived?"

He kisses her again, and she's got her arms wrapped around his shoulders this time. He wants to press his front to hers, but he can tell she's avoiding it, so he stops. He wants to cup her breast, and he does, but soon let's go when she (very subtly) jerks at that and instead places his hand on her hip, her thigh. Stuart doesn't want to pressure her, and it feels good. Kissing Murdoc (with her long tongue, how  _responsive_ she is, her traveling hands...) feels good. And when Murdoc leaves a striking hickey on his neck, he knows she feels good, too. 

 

* * *

 

 

The first time Murdoc comes over to Stuart's, Russel isn't home.

He shows her his keyboards, plays her a bit and tells her of his dad and how they customized bits and pieces. She cocks her head to the side and smirks. "You,"she slung her bass off her back,"are _odd._ " She then plays him a bit of her bass, and he's impressed, sure, and traces the strings with his fingers. "Where'd you get it?"he asks and she smirks. She leans to him and says, rather sinisterly, "hell." 

Wicked. 

 

 

* * *

 

The second time Murdoc comes over, Russel is home.

When the two lock eyes, there was an instant familiarity. The two start chatting about something called  _Clarissa's Closet_ , which, unbeknownst to Stuart at the time, was the perfect store for custom high heels for the drag queens around town. "If I'd known _you_ were the Russel Hobbs,"Murdoc says,"goodness." Russel at the moment is actually quite delighted, a bit embarrassed and very much surprised. The two shared a kinship of some kind, which left Stuart mute in the corner, staring blankly at the two. Everything seemed fine and dandy, until, of course, Murdoc says, "still can't believe you fit in any of those what with your, uh, ya know?"

Stuart takes Murdoc out when Russel's delighted face scrunches into something bitter. 

Much to Stuart's surprise (and relief), when he returned home a few hours later, Russel told him to bring Murdoc round more often.

And he does. 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 They're in Stuart's room, on his bed, not locking lips for once. Across the room, _Planet Terror_ is playing on low, low volume and sure, Stuart is watching the screen, but his attention is on Murdoc who is pressed against him, her head on his chest, her hand stretched on his stomach. They're talking, he thinks? Fuck, she smells good. 

"What's fun about pole dancin', exactly?"Stuart says, casually (hopefully). "That shi' looks complicated."

Murdoc's brow knits together, her finger circles Stuart's stomach. "It's lots of fun, actually,"she says to his collarbone,"and besides, I like the attention."

"Mmm,"Stuart wiggles his arm beneath Murdoc and wraps it around her waist.

 Maybe it's the fact that they've had a few beers, but Murdoc continued. "M' dad used to make me do this talent show when I was younger. I hated it."

Stuart looks down at her, sees how open she's being. He's going to be a bit brave. "Why?"

She shifts a bit. "It was humiliating. I never wanted to feel that way on stage again. Probably part of why I got so into bands. Probably why I got so into pole dancing."

He lifts his hand, rakes his fingers through her hair and presses his nose to the top of her head. "Your dad sounds like a wanker."

Stuart can feel her smile. "That's right."

 

* * *

 

 

Murdoc's back is to Stuart when he presses a kiss against her shoulder. She shrugs him off, huffs, "ge' off, 'm busy."

He wraps his arms around her waist instead, much to her (vocal) dismay. (eg, "Dullard") and watches her busy herself with watching the kettle. A thought comes to his mind, a " _you're not like this when the lights are off_ ," but doesn't say it.

Stuart smells her hair, his nose brushes against her earlobe. "Hey,"she says, annoyed. "C'mon." Stuart rests his head on her shoulder instead. An " _it's 'cus Russel's in the next room, innit?"_ but doesn't say it. 

No, instead, after a long silence, he says the most stupid thing. Because of course, he does. 

"Why did ye keep yer name?"

She glares at him. "I like it, that's why"she spats before whipping her head and nudging an elbow to his ribs. She's in a worse mood than before, but he doesn't leave her side. 

 

* * *

 

 Stuart knows that Murdoc loves to drink and that she loves to call him. When she's drunk.

Most of the calls are at 4am, which is when Stuart is awake anyway, which isn't an issue. Half of them are her yelling at someone else in the background, a quarter is her grunts and coughs and the other quarter is the message which seemed to almost always be lost in translation, but that's not an issue. Stuart forgets most of them, which is best for Murdoc since he assumes she'd be more than embarrassed if he ever brought it up, so that's not an issue either. 

No, it's one phone call. Just one. It keeps itching at Stuart. Nags at him out of nowhere in the middle of the day. 

It was a Thursday call, and Murdoc is sniffing more than coughing (so far as Stuart can tell - you never know with Murdoc, really) and she says a single line before hanging up, "this has never lasted this long with me, Stu. It almost always ends soon. I'm not used to this."

Stuart regrets not calling back.

 

* * *

  

They were so close this time.

They're in the dressing room again (where the two exchanged a phone number, months back). Murdoc is on the countertop and Stuart is in between her legs. They're kissing, naturally, but it's different this time. They're moaning into each other's mouths, Murdoc keeps pressing herself against him and his hand is under her shirt. He's beyond excited and starts fiddling with her bra strap, kissing her neck, her nails are digging into his back and

\- Stuart can feel Murdoc's hard cock against his thigh. 

He stops and jerks back. They're staring at each other for long, painful moments. It's so quiet. It's so cold.

"I,"Stuart's mouth feels dry,"I'm sorr-"-oh _fuck_ ,"Murdoc interjects, which makes Stuart jump again.

Murdoc's hand brushes the hair out of her face, she scoffs and looks away to the side. She's laughing bitterly. "I should've known. This happens every fucking time."

Stuart is so very confused, and these words bumble out of his mouth on instinct, "I'm sorry."

She whips her head, glares furiously at him. "Oh, we're sorry now, are we?"

Murdoc gets off the countertop, straightens herself.

"Well, Stu-Pot, since we're sharing apologies; I'm so sorry you have to wait to fuck me when you could've gone round with any sodding bird in town instead of messing around with a bitch, like me, who is _not_ pretty and _not_ the least bit feminine and all I can offer you is my  _cock."_

Before he realizes it, she's shoved him, he is falling back and a door is slammed in his face. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel insecure about writing Murdoc. I always think "is this asshole enough? I don't think this is asshole enough". Idk,,, I feel like a transitioning Murdoc wouldn't be as aggressive seeing as how she's desperately trying to appear feminine in her respects, and I feel that I try to express that at the end of this chapter. There really isn't a proper "how to write an asshole character" guide. I'll probably add more to this later to expand on their relationship before the conflict, but I'm tired. Please enjoy this terrible cliffhanger. Peace and love.


	4. And this is crazy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, the shortest chapter yet! Wanted to keep this brief, since I felt that resolutions (especially apologies) should be kept short. I wrote plenty more, though, so there will be multiple chapters uploaded today. Please enjoy.

Murdoc didn't owe Stuart anything. That's how she felt.

She left her phone. She asked for time off. She stayed in. She drank herself silly.

She didn't owe him jack shit.

* * *

It had been two weeks until Murdoc picks up the phone.

"I want to apologize,"Stuart says, his voice still as squeaky, "in person."

Murdoc stares at her filthy ceiling. She was missing the fresh air. She was definitely not wanting to see him.

"Okay,"she replies.

* * *

 

Murdoc doesn't remember which café it was. Fuck, she can't even remember which day it was. She just remembered the conversation. It sat with her that night. It's what made her accept his invitation to see him again.

"I,"he tapped his fingers on the table, "I didn't mind waiting....Don't look at me like that. I mean it, I-I didn't mind waiting to do anything.....Ok, maybe I minded a bit -but! But! I didn't want to push you, Murdoc. I'm not, I'm  _not_ the best at this,  _this._ My head gets all mucked up and it's hard to think, but I've been thinking about this and, and I- you are pretty. I think you're bloody gorgeous and I don't want anyone but you... Listen, I just, I fucked up, okay? I didn't handle that well. I'm an idiot. I'm not used to this, but I want to try and be good at this- to be good for you." 

Murdoc reached for Stuart from across the table. She brushes the hair out of his face. "You're not an idiot."

* * *

 

 

It takes a while, but Murdoc kisses Stuart again. He holds her, and it felt good. This was good.

 

* * *

 

She's back to visiting his apartment again. 

Stuart's keyboards are scattered everywhere and Russel's drumset is in the progress of being unpacked. She's on the sofa, lazing about and Stuart comes to sit next to her. He wraps his arm around her shoulders and she shifts closer to him, this all being perfectly normal to Russel across the room preparing a sandwich for himself. 

It's a long, comfortable silence. Stuart looks down at Murdoc, giving her a blank look which Murdoc is used to until he says "do you wanna join the band?"

Of course she wanted to join the band.

 

* * *

 

 

It hadn't been long until Murdoc quit her job and moved in.

It wasn't even a month after that when she discovered Kong Studios.

 

 

 

 

 


	5. Why can't I ever get mine, sugar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

>  Stuart discovers that he really likes fucking Murdoc.

 

It was different with Murdoc.

The first time one of them is pantless, Stuart is the one on his knees. This was after some debate, though, with Murdoc fretting that'd it'd "ruin things" and Stuart insisting that he "really wanted to". And he did. Having Murdoc thriving above him and her hands in his hair is something he wanted. Making her come and offer a lazy handjob afterward (being rather shy, too, until Stuart kisses her) is something he wanted. Making Murdoc feel _good._ That's what he wanted. 

So Stuart finds himself always reaching for Murdoc, getting her off and leaving wet kisses anywhere (thighs, stomach, shoulders) afterward. Which, admittedly, isn't all that different from when he was with other birds (the constant want to snog, that is) but it's definitely different when it comes to, the, well, fucking.

Admittedly, Stuart would get bored with birds after a while. But with Murdoc, it hasn't happened. Murdoc has a tendency to change positions, the two she prefers the most being riding Stuart (calling him names whilst doing so, pulling at his hair, pushing him further into the mattress) and below Stuart (begging for more, wrapping her legs around his waist).

She loves being rough, constantly wanting  _more_ and constantly reminding Stuart to do so ( _"It's never fucking enough, Stu. I want everything."_ ). Murdoc leaves scratches on his back, bites on his neck and when Stuart realizes this he almost never has his shirt on while they're fucking.  She likes surveying the damage afterward, tracing the sores along his shoulder blades and laughing softly, then kissing him. 

It's almost unbelievable how tame and relaxed Murdoc is after, cuddling up to Stuart and wanting long, slow kisses when just a moment ago she was moaning her head off and being absolutely shameless.

Murdoc has reached the point where she's no longer shy about these things. Murdoc is assuredly better at giving head or jerking off than Stuart what with her experience, which makes Stuart just a teensy bit insecure, but Murdoc wipes it away, muttering in his ear "you're fucking perfect, babe." Speaking of which, compliments during sex is almost commonplace, especially on Stuart's end. Murdoc tugs at his hair for more, and Stuart doesn't run out of " _you're so beautiful"_ and " _I want you"_. 

Stuart knows that Murdoc likes to be held and complimented and being sprinkled with kisses after, even if she hasn't openly admitted it. But he can't help but be curious, so one time he asks Murdoc to "uh, um, ya know." And Murdoc teases him and says "oh I don't know. Wha' do you mean?". Stuart gets flustered and less than quietly replies "I want you to _bugger_ me, Murdoc." And she does, and Stuart liked it, to say the least. 

Any of this is the least Stuart can say about having sex with Murdoc. There aren't the right words that jumble in his head to describe what it's like being with Murdoc, how it's different and new and, and well-

Stuart loves it. 


	6. Five Times Murdoc Was Speechless

**Ramraid**

Murdoc didn't want to come out this way. Or more specifically, didn't want to come out to _him_ in any way, at all. 

Butch sinks into his seat, stares back at Murdoc in something of horror.  _Lonely Boy_ is on the radio, filling the silence between the two.

"You-"Butch whispers, afraid, "you're not serious."

Murdoc regrets not biting back. Murdoc regrets not smashing Butch's face in. Murdoc regrets not telling him that yes, she  _is_ leaving this pussy riddled gang to go through the transition she's been wanting since she was sixteen and saw a photo of her mum in a hospital bed. 

Murdoc regrets thinking that exiting the car and moving on was enough. 

* * *

**Ohana**

Murdoc was a year on hormones, her hair reached her collarbone and she had lost a considerable amount of weight. She thought that she looked good.

That is, until, Hannibal is on her doorstep. 

He had come in search of money, but that goal was clearly lost as he is standing in front of her, laughing his head off.

In that moment, Murdoc had drained every defense from her body and is left staring blankly at him like a dead fish.

She shuts the door in his face, sure, but she wishes she could've said something, _anything_ , so she could've at least kept her one good mirror. 

* * *

  **Clarrissa's Closet**

At the time, Murdoc didn't know that she had bumped into Russel Hobbs. Instead, she thought she had bumped into a tall, dark, beautiful woman who turned back to look down at her.

It had caused a silent disturbance in the shop, strangers glancing their way. Murdoc didn't know if she was embarrassed or flustered or any of that snot, but having this attention was much different to what she was used to. The realization that she was possibly in a store filled with women ( _women_ ) kicks the wind out of her lungs and so she is frozen on the spot. 

Everything seemed to be crumbling around her until the woman stretches her hand out to her with a smile. "Watch where you're going, 'k honey? Some of us can't spot little things like you." The anxiety melts away. Murdoc takes the stranger's hand. 

* * *

  **Fertile**

Murdoc and Stuart had been dating for close to a year now. 

He wants her to meet his mum, which is ridiculous. Absurd. Stupid. Moronic. She changes her makeup a third time on the drive there. 

"M' mum will love you,"Stuart lies, because why wouldn't he be lying? But when his mum ( _"Rachel, call me Rachel!"_ ) hugs her at the door, Murdoc knows where the idiocy must have come from. 

"It's a very English thing, innit?"Rachel says as she pours, even more, tea into Murdoc's cup even if she didn't ask. Stuart is off somewhere, something about showing her his collections or compilations of some sort. Whatever it was, it meant that he wasn't _here_ and it only made things worse. Rachel is staring at Murdoc with a smile plastered on her face and Murdoc is less than comfortable. There's a part of Murdoc that feels intimidated by this woman - how she's so...so womanly with her long hair and flowery smell and fuck Murdoc should've worn a better top.

"Oh, sorry,"Rachel says, recognizing her behavior (which is unlike Stuart, Murdoc notes). "I'm just so excited to meet you,"she confesses to Murdoc. "Stuart never brought his girlfriends to meet me." Murdoc finds this beyond flattering, sitting up a little straighter and taking a prideful sip of her tea. "You're so lovely, too. I'm quite relieved."

Then Rachel leans in a little closer and Murdoc can feel her chest tighten. "Now if you could gimme some grandkids, that'd be-"

To Stuart, who was two rooms away, his mother's screams were evident enough that Murdoc had spilled the hot tea into Rachel's lap. 

* * *

  **Green**

Noodle popped out of that box a perfect little girl. 

Her petite frame, sweet voice, and an adorable little face were so feminine in Murdoc's eyes that only and idiot could mistake Noodle for a boy. A part of Murdoc, painfully enough, was jealous of her. It was painful to admit it to herself (that she was jealous of a ten-year-old who she could barely understand) and she holds a smidge bitterness for Noodle and is annoyed when the little girl grabs her hair or holds onto her side the way she does. 

Russel carefully explains to Murdoc why this is after an incident in which Noodle woke Murdoc up in the middle of the night, to quote "give her a sodding bedtime story."

 He says, "she recognizes you as the only other feminine figure in the group and so grows a maternal attachment to you."

Murdoc snorts at that and calls Russel crazy before going back to bed and leaving Noodle with him. 

Russel believes it, though, and so a week later asks Murdoc to take Noodle with her to the store. Murdoc does this to only avoid Russel's lecturing but regrets this as she finds herself in this situation.

The cashier is looking between the two, a confused look smeared on his face. Murdoc is dumbstruck as Noodle clings to her side. 

"Uh,"he drawls, "you are her mother, right?"

Murdoc doesn't answer, but Noodle does with a small "Hai!" and Murdoc swears she didn't start crying (but she did).

 


	7. And The One Time She Wasn't

 

For once, they're in the Winnebago.

They're huddled in the bed, practically naked (Murdoc is, Stuart is at least in his briefs) and having a lazy cuddle whilst _The Human League_ plays softly on a busted radio.

Before this, practice was over and the two decided to escape to Murdoc's Winnebago to fool around, but Murdoc soon got out of her mood and wanted a cuddle instead. She had scratched Stuart's back on request, though, and was now tracing the sores along his shoulder blade, laughing softly and leaving a kiss along his neck. Stuart then shifted onto his back so that Murdoc could lay her head on his chest and hooks her one leg onto his.

Murdoc could feel his eyes on her but didn't mind the staring. He did this sometimes - blankly stare off into space without a thought for long moments, and then popped back into reality with a "what?" directed to no one.

His hand is on her back now, smooths over and rests on her ass before going back up and brushes her hair. His mouth is against her forehead and she leans in with a soft hum. She felt safe, like this, and soon began to drift off, not noticing that Stuart had called her name twice by now.

She lifts her head from his chest, glances up at him. He's got a confused look on his face, like he'd forgotten what to say before it occurred to him, and he says it to her real soft and slow, "I love you."

Time had stopped for Murdoc.

She remembers Stuart's breath on her cheek as he asked for her number, his fidgeting on their first date, the sloppy fight and the haste apologies, the first time he held her, when he asked her to join her band and asked her to move in.

She remembers that photo of her mother, she remembers joining and then leaving Butch's gang, she remembers her brother on her doorstep, she remembers the first time she'd seen Russels' beautiful face, she remembers having Rachel give her blessings and she remembers Noodle clinging to her side as she begun to cry.

She's not going to shut her mouth and dumbly watch his face. She's not going to let this moment slip by, no, she refuses. Instead, she feels a relaxed smile on her face as she says,

"I love you, too."


	8. It ain't easy bein' green

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's right. It's THAT chapter.

 

Before Noodle, there was Paula Cracker.

Well, specifically, an audition by Paula Cracker. An audition that both Russel and Stuart found was decent, but Murdoc faced with a bored, tired face. She didn't even shift in her seat when Stuart brought Paula into the studio.

"I've seen a dozen like her,"Murdoc mutters. "This isn't her scene, trust me."

Russel snorts at this, his hand rests on his thigh as he leans to Murdoc. "What's got _you_ on a high horse?" Then Murdoc meets his eyes, something clicked, and Russel gets up from his seat with a chuckle (which left Murdoc more than a little annoyed).

Stuart, from across the room, didn't quite click, though, and preferred to just let the issue go. It had only been a while since he and Murdoc had an argument ( _photo albums, attic, phone call_ ) and didn't want to trigger another one anytime soon. 

That was before Noodle, though. 

 

Now, on the other hand, Murdoc and Stuart had been as calm together as ever. 

They're on the floor. Laying down, meeting at the shoulders and staring up at the ceiling. It had been a quiet day at Kong Studios, which is rare, so the two were merely soaking it up for as long as they could. Then, Stuart ruined it. He just had to. 

The memory of Paula came back to him, so he says, "Oh my God. You were jealous."

This made Murdoc jump, and she turns to him with a scrunched face. " _What?_ "

He doesn't think but instead answers "Paula. You were jealous of Paula."

There's a beat of silence.  Then Murdoc sits up, glares down at Stuart and he regretted opening his mouth. A lot.

"What makes you think I was jealous of that ugly, talentless bird?"she spats and Stuart is quick to sit up, too. "I don't know. How would I know?"

"Exactly,"Murdoc starts, her voice loud, but then it dies down and she stops altogether. Again, Stuart doesn't quite click yet, as Murdoc looks away with what he wants to call embarrassment. 

 

 

It's quiet, again, but this time, it's so _tense._

 

She looks at his hands, her eyes are soft. It hits Stuart in the stomach.

 

Stuart reaches for Murdoc's hand. "Noodle thinks Russel and you are her parents."

Murdoc whips her head, gawking at Stuart. "What the hell St-"

"I hate it."

 

Something moves between them. Murdoc dodges Stuart's hand and touches his upper arm. She thinks for a long moment before meeting his eyes again.

"Maybe,"she says,"maybe she wasn't that bad."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried not to antagonize Paula, like, at all and instead focus on the unaddressed jealousy issues between the two. (and I'm quite frankly sick of the anti-Paula ANYTHING tbh). Sorry if this was a lackluster update. I have ideas for more chapters, but I'm tackling with the actual writing it down part. Thanks so much for all the positive comments, they're a highlight of my week.


	9. getting to know you (getting to know me)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stuart gets to know more about Murdoc.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More establishing a relationship!! Oh boy.

The first time Stuart had tried to look at Murdoc's photo album, it didn't end well. 

The second time Stuart had tried to look at Murdoc's photo album, she showed it to him. 

 

He holds a photo carefully, Murdoc shifting next to him. 

"Teddy boy?"Stuart mutters, looks to Murdoc. "Really?"

Murdoc scoffs, lightly kicks Stuart's ankle. "Sod off."

He shuffled through the other photos, recognizes sharp faces, crooked noses, and furrowed brows. Bowl cut hair, terrible (worn out) suits and cigarettes.  He then looks back to Murdoc, who has already leaned back on the headboard by the fifth photo. He looks over her long hair and her glossy lips and says, "looks nothing like you."

She looks past him and reaches for the photo so Stuart hands it to her. He leans back and rests his head on Murdoc's shoulder as her eyes glaze over the photo.

"I used to hate him,"she says. "I was running from this bloke my whole life." Her thumb is pressed next to the face. "Now I'm just sorry for him."

Stuart glances up at her. He could've sworn her eyes were teary. 

 

"You know what makes me mad?"he asks quietly (very quietly).

"What?"

 

"You look better in a suit than I did." Then Stuart digs his pocket and he swears it wasn't like he prepared for this, okay, maybe it's just normal for a man to carry a picture of his thirteen-year-old self around. He pulls it out of his pocket, hands it to Murdoc, and is met with a roar of laughter. 

"Oh my Satan! You look like such a _wanker!_ "

Murdoc has sunken in her seat and she's on her back now, Stuart hovers over her. Once her laughter has died down, she takes a look at the photo again, then up at Stuart. 

 

"Your eyes were blue."

He kisses her.

 

 

* * *

 

 Stuart didn't tell Murdoc that Russel was in the kitchen when she got up to get coffee, which he admits is a mistake.

 

He could partially make out some of the conversation. 

 

"Listen, we need to talk."

"Oh blimey."

"Murdoc.....it's Noodle, see I don't want you going around.....you're setting a bad example....she's only ten."

"Oh Satan-"-Murdoc-"-she's much smarter than you think she is, you dolt."

"What did you just call me?" 

"Ye heard me you.....now lemme get my coffee, please. I'm sick of...."

"I'm only trying to talk to you, Murdoc you don't have to-"-you don't have to ladeedaa, you oaf-"

 

Stuart stops listening then. There's still chatter for a few moments. He hears a thud. He can hear Russel stomp away. The kettle is on.

 

Stuart doesn't tell Murdoc that there's a part of him that likes it when she and Russel argue, which he admits is a good thing.

 

* * *

 

 

They were just at a bar getting drinks, being recognized and having a good time. Until Murdoc runs out.

Stuart follows her, finds her squatting down and breathing heavily. She's crying.

Stuart isn't used to Murdoc crying. 

His immediate move is to squat next to her, ask her "what's wrong?" and reach for her. 

She swats his hands away, hides her tear stricken face and sobs into her palms.

She's shaking. He's still.

What is he meant to do? Does he get her something? What is that something? Does he leave? What will she do if he does? What made her cry? Is it something he did? Is it something he didn't do? Should he get help? Should he-

"I was nine,"she breaks through her sobs. What?

"I was nine, and she,"Murdoc is sniffling more than crying now, "she took me to the back, and I didn't know-"

Stuart doesn't know what this means, but now he's the one shaking. "Murdoc-"-hold me."

Her voice was croaky and soft. Stuart holds her. His shirt got wet.

 

 

* * *

 

 Murdoc sleeps much less than Stuart, which is more than just concerning.

He'd watch her leave to her Winnebago and listen for the booming metal music moments later. He always assumes it continues even after he's slept if Murdoc's tired eyes were any evidence (then again, her eyes are always tired.)

This time, he looks up from his hands and interrupts Murdoc's walk with a clearing of his throat.

"Hey, Muds. Do you wanna sleep in my room tonight?"

She looks over her shoulder with an arched brow. "Excuse me?"

 

She sleeps his in room consistently after that. 

 

* * *

 

 Stuart wasn't entirely aware that Murdoc had her hand on his thigh for the majority of the interview.

Or that she kept leaning against him, her hand going from his thigh to his shoulder to his thigh again.

He didn't know that she was flirting with him (her suggestive talk was just normal to him).

He didn't know that she was being rude to the interviewer, either (her harsh comments were also just normal to him too).

And yes, he was there when she tipped the interviewer with his uncommon nickname "2D" (which later caught fire among their fans).

Stuart didn't think that Murdoc was too suggestive (or possessive, over him) and brash. She was just Murdoc.

Well, that's what he answers Russel, later, anyway. 

 

* * *

 

 

He tells her he loves her, again, after a show. 

"Fuck you,"she says, and then kisses him.

 

 


	10. the breakup

Stuart held onto the strap of his shoulder bag tightly. He looked behind him several times, paranoid of Noodle or Russel being behind him.

He turns back, though, when he hears the door of the Winnebago creak open.

Murdoc looks down at him, her head cocked to the side. "That little? Really?"she gestures to the shoulder bag. 

Stuart drums his fingers on his thigh. "M' keyboards are with you."

She nods knowingly, then meets his eyes. 

It stays like that for long moments, and Stuart could hear his heart hammering in his chest. 

The more he thought of how he'd met Murdoc years ago, that their band, _Gorillaz_ , had gone this far from his and Russel's apartment, the louder his heart got and the more static filled his head space.

He couldn't exactly.... _accept_ this, but then he realizes that Murdoc is giving him a bemused look, and she says "are you coming?"

There was a slight fear to Murdoc's expression ( _"you're not going to leave_ me _? are you? after all of this?"_ ) and Stuart notices, even if she doesn't think he doesn't.

Stuart shakes his head and readjusts his grip on the strap. He steps forward and reaches for the doorframe. "Course I am,"he says and pretends that his voice didn't just crack.

 

* * *

 

 

 

They drove nowhere, but Murdoc said that didn't matter. Stuart agreed.

 

* * *

 

 

The band had broken up. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the ending!! ah!! :P i was hoping to write more for this specific universe, but here, have the definite ending of this romance (in phase 1, anyway) and that ending being no ending at all! hazzah. the two go on a long roadtrip until Gorillaz regroup again. i hope this was a satisfying ending and that i'll have the energy to visit this universe again.


End file.
